Buy low, sell high

There is a hot new investment on the Somali stock exchange. Be careful about investing though. You might need to walk the plank.

My excellent halloween costume

It occurred to me as I was assembling this costume that the costume is at its best when considered abstractly. When considering how it looks in the real world, it loses some of its cachet, a lot of it in fact. I should have just left you with a mental image of my costume, and leave it at that.

Recall its components: bald wig, Bearcats shirt, Military intelligence patch, dress pants, barefoot running shoes, fingerless gloves. For the party, I also brought along some sweet and sour chicken and non alcoholic beer, with plastic silverware (not pictured).

As for the party itself, no one took one look at me and said "you oxymoron, you". Only upon explaining that the elements function independently of another, and not to try to figure out what kind of costume the ensemble looks like, did some people, not all, get it. Even after they figured out what I was, they didn't understand what I had on my head. I didn't go through the trouble of trying to make it look authentic by using putty to 'blend' it into my forehead, and so people thought I was wearing some sort of latex hat, not a bald wig.

I have actually tried the barefoot running shoes a couple of times. Once walking in the woods over some bumpy terrain, and once running on a treadmill. The jury is still out on that.

This concludes the blog. Thank you for your suggestions and to Lona for the fingerless gloves.

Roal

Creepy Shoes Club Critique

I got the exact same shoes in the mail today! How cool is that? After finding my size in the store I found some used vibram fivefingers classics on ebay for $50 with no signs of wear. I just got back from my first run in them and thought I'd share my review.

They remind me of rubber palmed work gloves for your feet and their construction is essentially the same with a bit more structure. So like gloves, they can be squished or rolled up which is a bonus when you want a light and compact shoe for packing. I ran a an 8:52min mile on the treadmill with them. What I liked about them is it was like running barefoot, which encourages you to keep off your heels. They felt springier than when I run in socks. I also have the problem with socks where the soles will get hot from friction against the treadmill belt. This was not a problem with the fivefingers which I suspect will save me blisters.

Now for the bad:
My first complaint is more of a personal problem. I am only 5'1" and thus my pants are often too long. I count on my shoes for the lift to keep my pants off the ground and dry. My pants were a soggy mess from walking in the wet parking lot though the shoes themselves stayed dry. My other complaint is after the run I noticed uncomfortable rubbing on my left inner heel cause by stitches. This would have become a blister had I worn them longer. There is a thread end I'll try to snip out or if that doesn't work, a fabric bandaid applied to the inner heel has always fixed this.

Other things to consider are the fit of the shoe. They literally need to fit like a glove. This is a minor issue for me since they don't make a size small enough to be snug on me in the bottom on the heel. Fivefingers must be tried on in person to find your size as their sizing does not reliably convert into your standard shoe size. Also abnormality in your toe shape can cause discomfort. Brian probably doesn't want me spreading this on the Internet, but two of his toes are webbed halfway up his foot. The shoe construction puts a lot of pressure on his mutant toe web.

All in all, I think it's a very exciting innovation in footwear which will no doubt lead to better foot health. I used to have to wear orthotics before I started barefoot running. I can remember having pain in my unusually high left arch ever since I learned to walk. Now I've beat my foot issues into submission by training on a treadmill. My hope is that these shoes will let me transfer that success into trail running.

My excellent Halloween costume

Progress report:

I have finally made a financial commitment to this endeavor. Over the weekend, I bought a military intelligence patch and a University of Cincinnati Bearcat T shirt. It was over the internet, so they haven't arrived yet. Today I went to a real store to buy some Barefoot Running Shoes/Foot Gloves (this item is a twofer oxymoron), the vibram five finger shoes. I didn't realize it until I went to the store, but these things have quite a following. It made me more confident in my $85 investment. I chose a modest black pair. They do have some that were more outlandish looking, really looking like the foot equivalent of those "Mule" work gloves, gray with green trim. I thought that would make more of an impact on my Halloween costume, but I also figured that on November 1, I'd be happy to have the pair that I think look better.

I need to get the bald wig soon. The "dress pants" I have. Dottie suggested "fingerless gloves", I always associate them with the Fagin character in Oliver Twist, and I do think that is worth looking into. Sweet and sour chicken w plastic silverware, what else? I think the costume is complete enough that unless it's just too good to pass up, I will forego spending anything more than a nominal amount of money for anything else.

One more thing: the wearer of the cardboard belt. Did someone get that and I missed it? It was Zero Mostel, playing Max Bialystok in the original movie "The Producers" with Gene Wilder. Which brings me to another question, far afield now from clothes or oxymora: what was Gene Wilder's film debut?

My excellent Halloween costume #4

Shirt and pants

One of the cleverest oxymorons I came across, and so easy come by was "dress pants" - I preferred the idea of wearing that to wearing "tight slacks". Now it may not be so easy to recognize as an oxymoron, but certainly can be explained in two words.

What I really wanted for my top half was a sweatshirt or t-shirt for the Guilford College (or University of Pennsylvania, or some other schools) Fighting Quakers. I have yet to locate one that actually says "Fighting Quakers", and if I would just wear one that says "Guilford College" that would involve too much explanation.

So if I can't get one of those, a back up is a sweatshirt or t shirt of the University of Cincinnati BearKats. I haven't seen that on any sanctioned list of oxymora, but since a bear can't be a cat (or even a Kat ) it counts in my book.

So there is some room for alternatives to make the costume if anyone can think of any.

My plan is to have one more post on accessories before the week is out, and this weekend decide on a plan and then start acquiring these things

Thanks for all of your comments so far.

My excellent Halloween Costume

I always wanted to blog, but I thought you needed a reason!

I am invited to a Halloween party on October 24, so I need a costume. I have an idea for it, but assembling it is kind of a ‘process’ and something that I think will blog well. I am to go as an oxymoron. The idea is to collect and execute all the wearable oxymorons I can come up with.

I actually had this idea about six months ago. At the time, I went onto oxymoron.com, or some such site, and offered up my idea for comment and suggestions to the oxymoronic community. They totally let me down without a single comment, helpful or otherwise. Maybe Halloween was to far away at the time to get their attention, but they had their chance, and I will not be favoring those geeks with updates on my progress, or any further opportunity to comment. I will favor you , instead.

This did not stop me from trolling oxymoron sites for ideas. After satisfying myself that an oxymoron costume was doable, meaning at least one or two items for each of the basic categories, I will now enlist your help in making it the best it can be.

As I see it, the parts of the costume are: (1) footwear (2) headwear (3) clothes (4) accessories and (5) props. Props are not wearable in themselves, but if for example, if I thought carrying one of those invisible dog leashes would enhance an oxymoron costume, (and I don’t) it would be in the props category. In order to not run out of all my material at once my next entry will just focus on the footwear.

A couple of more items 1. this party is a full week before Halloween, so I need to keep this on a slightly accelerated schedule. 2. I have not set a budget for this costume (maybe I can talk about that later) but I am not opposed to spending a modest amount of money for this, particularly if it is for items I think I will have a use for later.

Sometimes my perceptions about what will be useful in the future are a little off. For example, last year, I was Donald Trump. I had to buy a wig of course, and I got a power suit at the thrift store at a reasonable price. However, I had to wear several layers of clothes to bulk up and I thought I would get hot. So I bought one of those cooling vests that those people who dress up in school mascot costumes wear for about $60. At the time I thought I would find no end of uses for it. Oh, well…

Finally, one interesting thing I did get from those sites was the fact that the word oxymoron itself is an oxymoron: from oxýmōros sharp-dull, equiv. to oxý(s) sharp + mōrós dull.